Over my lifetime, I have developed and still maintain a long list of things I want to do before my time is over. Yoga has never been one of them. Let me be clear. I have nothing against yoga. I’ve just never seen it as beneficial. Until recently. It is true that the older we get, the longer it takes for our bodies to bounce back. Our cells take a little longer to regenerate. Joints begin to wear out or get stiff. Allergies get worse. Aging is not an easy thing to do, especially aging gracefully. But I far prefer getting older to the alternative!
To that end, I decided it was time to do something proactive. Thus, yoga.
I purchased all the appropriate paraphernalia and signed up for a class that a friend of mine was teaching. She’s an excellent instructor and takes everyone right where they are. No judgment. Just understanding. Which was a good thing because I knew nothing about yoga. And I was pretty sure standing on my head or trying to balance on one foot was not going to do me much good. I was wrong! Oh, so very wrong!
I had learned about deep and focused breathing as a pain management tool after an accident left me in nearly constant pain. I had chosen to not take pharmaceuticals. But I needed a way to cope. Focused breathing helped me manage.
So, in yoga class, when we were told to breathe, I knew exactly what to do. In with the new, out with the old. Focus. In with the good, out with the bad. Feel the air in your lungs. In with calm and peace; out with the pain. Visualize. Easy.
But when we were tasked to go into the lotus position, I thought I might die! This was the most basic position and I couldn’t even do it! I started to panic. What was I doing here? I glanced around. Could I leave without being noticed?
The answer to that was ‘no’. She was watching me. And talking. Just above the relaxing music came her voice; calm, reassuring, non-judgmental. Breathe, concentrate, locate your center. Find that happy place where you can relax.
For me, my happy place is different, depending upon what I am doing. Today, it was floating on a soft cloud in the sky, a gentle breeze lightly kissing my face, cooling, and refreshing. Nothing around but blue sky and a few white, puffy clouds. Perfect. I closed my eyes. I breathed. I found my spot. I could feel the tight muscles in my legs relaxing as I slowly got them into the correct position. I was astounded. My legs had not moved like this in years! Was I dreaming? No. I was still here, in this room filled with other women, mostly about my own age. We laughed and talked. Confided and cheered each other on. We were all struggling with something. Some with disease. Others with injuries. A few with the simple need to escape for a moment from everyday life. But we were all here, in this space, making each others’ lives – and our own – just a little bit better.
I will continue to do yoga as long as I can manage, though I suspect I will never be very good at it. But that doesn’t matter. What I have learned is that you don’t have to be perfect. You just have to try. And, in doing so, you will find a better part of yourself.
Namaste
Pat stephens says
I can’t do a lot of these posses! My body rebels!
Debbie says
I love yoga and have been doing it off and on for years. My daughters and I are signed up for goat yoga in a few weeks. I can’t wait!
B says
Haha! I’m pretty sure I’m not ready for goat yoga!
Patricia Ann Ledgerwood says
Good for you girl. Braver than i could ever imagine. Keep it up!